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Why can't we choose when to checkout? http://ondrums.net/forum/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=1112	Page 1 of 1

Author:	SonoRon [ Sun May 26, 2013 2:23 pm ]
Post subject:	Why can't we choose when to checkout?
Just heard my gran passed away and for some reason wanted to say something and for some reason decided here was the place to say it...... Just two days ago she was in hospital in high spirits, doing her crosswords and fully aware of her surroundings. Last night wetting the bed, unable to speak properly, screaming in pain, struggling to breath, unable to drink or eat......desperate to die. When she said she wanted to die the nurses kept her alive with painkillers, oxygen etc. When a person wants to go why do we keep them going? I know this may seem controversial but the memories I now have are horrific Ok I'm done

Author:	cliff [ Sun May 26, 2013 4:55 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: Why can't we choose when to checkout?
Ron, I am sorry that the last memories of your grandmother are, right now anyway, those of pain and suffering, and not the good ones that you undoubtedly have of her. Thanks for being here and for knowing that you are amongst friends that you can share things with. Neither you, I, nor anyone here can change any of what you and your grandmother experienced, but you knew that when you posted. I am glad you also knew that the guys care here, and they would if they could. Nothing but best wishes, speedy healing and good memories to you in the near future, Ron.

Author:	tim [ Sun May 26, 2013 8:07 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: Why can't we choose when to checkout?
Ron, I am truly sorry and know what you are going through. It took my grandparents years to go; their minds were gone but their bodies were strong. It's hard to watch. Be thankful that she only had a short time between being fit and passing on. Now is the time to enjoy family and your shared memories of her, you'll end up laughing more than anything, and hopefully that will erase the pain of her last few days. Take care, give the ones you love a hug and remind them how special they are to you t

Author:	Gregory [ Sun May 26, 2013 11:13 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: Why can't we choose when to checkout?
Ron, I can only echo the sentiments already stated. It is an odd fact of life that passing into the next stage can be much like the pain of birth. Sometimes the medical profession is overzealous to keep us going, but remember that, to doctors, death is considered the enemy, even though it is an enemy that must eventually win. From your description, it sounds more as if they were trying to make her comfortable than to keep her alive, but you know more about that than I. I know what it is to lose someone close. I will say some prayers for her and for you and your family.

Author:	SonoRon [ Mon May 27, 2013 1:21 am ]
Post subject:	Re: Why can't we choose when to checkout?
Thank you all for your kind words. I really appreciate you taking the time to post in reply

Author:	Atomic Rooster [ Mon May 27, 2013 12:19 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: Why can't we choose when to checkout?
Really sorry to hear about your grandmother passing away Ron. Sending condolences & prayers to you and your family. Hang in there brother......

Author:	Goki [ Tue May 28, 2013 4:32 am ]
Post subject:	Re: Why can't we choose when to checkout?
Very saddened to hear about this Ron. Try and stay strong at times like this... I remember my grandmother - she was ill but struggling. That was until my father passed away. Then, she was constantly saying to my mother "darling, Your husband is gone, so there's no point for me to be here..." And almost a year after, she was gone... Last year, my uncle passed away. No, it's the same story with my grandfather. Every-time I see him, he's crushed - simply lost the will... And it makes me shad a tear, every time. He hardly got over granny, and now one of his sons... But, there's no chance of choosing how things in life happen Ron. I've learned that on my own skin, so - one can do nothing but stay strong for the rest of the family!!! Remember her by good things - our granny will always be remembered by her spirit, smile, and delicious baking!!!

Author:	Jeff [ Tue May 28, 2013 7:11 am ]
Post subject:	Re: Why can't we choose when to checkout?
My thoughts are with you and yours. Hope the good memories will get you thru.

Author:	Kelly [ Wed May 29, 2013 7:09 am ]
Post subject:	Re: Why can't we choose when to checkout?
Hey Jeff, good to see you pop in brother. I can also echo the sentiments above Ron, especially that you feel this was a good place to post some of life's more serious matters and it would be trusted among friends. I used to have a thing growing up that I wouldn't go to funerals. Until I realized that it wasn't actually the deceased I was going for. There is comfort for others that is much needed. I still don't do caskets, go up front I mean. That is just not how I want to remember a person. Sorry for your loss my friend. I believe, our current losses here, will be great gain later.

Author:	latzanimal [ Wed May 29, 2013 9:58 am ]
Post subject:	Re: Why can't we choose when to checkout?
Ron, my condolences. One of life's hardest things to deal with is watching a loved one suffer. Try and focus on the happy memories, after all those are the things that make a relationship special....

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