On drums...

I only remember really dirty jokes...

Any Constitutional scholars here?

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Gregory

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Cliff

River City Trio

What if we did all have the same opinions?

I think it just became, in its entirety, an election issue.

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Gregory

A guy is out hunting one day in the woods. He gets himself set up and is aiming down the sight of his rifle where a bear comes into view. He gets ready to shoot, holds his breath and pulls the trigger. When the smoke clears to his surprise there is no bear to be seen. Confused he feels a tap on his shoulder and turns round to find the bear standing behind him. The bear says "Right you have two choices here. I can either eat you alive or you can have sex with me. The hunter pulls his trousers down and chooses option 2. (I promise I'm keeping this as clean as possible!)

The next weekend he gets a bigger rifle and heads out to the woods again. Gets comfy and the new rifle set up and loaded. Out walks the bear again and the hunter takes aim making sure this time to take the bear out with a single shot. Takes the shot but as the smoke clears no bear. He feels a tap on his shoulder again and sure enough there is the bear. "you want me to eat you or do you want to have sex with me?" Hunter takes option two again and leaves the woods ashamed.

The following weekend he decides it's time to deal with this bear so gets a rocket launcher and heads out to the woods. He gets the launcher set up in a location that he simply can't miss. Sure enough out comes the bear again and the hunter takes aim and shoots the rocket. Huge explosion that the bear could not have avoided. As the smoke clears the hunter realises there is no bear again! Tap on the shoulder and the hunter dreads turning round. He slowly turns round and the bear say's "Your not here for the hunting are you"

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Ron

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Gregory

Kids in the class talk about their parents' profession.

- Alex, what does your father do?!? - asks the teacher.
- He's a male prostitute - replies Alex calmly. Usually he sleeps with people in hotel rooms, but he also does strip shows if there's interest.

- everyone in the class is speechless.
The teacher pulls Alex to the side, and whispers - Alex, you should have told me before. I would have NEVER pulled you up in front of everybody.
- Actually Mrs. Dawson - whispers Alex - my father plays for our national soccer team, but I was too ashamed to admit it in front of everybody....

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Goki - short from Goran

Let the good drums roll!!!

Dad - when I grow up I wanna be a fireman, no a policeman, no a plumber, or better still, the cable guy...


'Honey, Mickey found "the tapes", again'....

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Goki - short from Goran

Let the good drums roll!!!

ha!

Little Johnny: Mommy, when I grow up I want to be a drummer!
Mommy: Now Johnny, you can't do both.